With thousands flocking to Bournemouth beaches during lockdown, people across the UK are understandably angered at the selfishness they are witnessing.
Not that we are here to judge, but "It's my right to go to the beach because it is slightly warm" is not really an excuse to break the lockdown protocols!
Off of the back of this, we thought we could help the government with a few suggestions they could offer to these people that also should fulfil their 'human rights'.
We have included 'bonus point' criteria also. After all, you're immune to COVID-19, so going for the bonus point is the right choice isn't it?!
Without further ado, let's show our support, and offer the three best alternatives for the cleverest people among us!
You are the real king. Go show them who's boss!
(Bonus points for rubbing the meat all over yourself before entering the cage)
Come on, we know you can do it. Grab your beach buddies and go for it!
(Bonus points for using a bicycle)
Imagine all those idiots that follow good food hygiene and can survive to live another day without fear of repercussions.
(Bonus points if the chicken is still moving when you eat it)
So there we have it, the three best alternatives to crowding on a beach during lockdown. We can't wait to be impressed by the strongest beach bods out there!
Come on people, don't let us down!
Not that we are here to judge, but "It's my right to go to the beach because it is slightly warm" is not really an excuse to break the lockdown protocols!
Off of the back of this, we thought we could help the government with a few suggestions they could offer to these people that also should fulfil their 'human rights'.
We have included 'bonus point' criteria also. After all, you're immune to COVID-19, so going for the bonus point is the right choice isn't it?!
Without further ado, let's show our support, and offer the three best alternatives for the cleverest people among us!
1). Feed the lions at the local zoo (from inside the cage of course)
Humans. We are top of the food chain, and therefore what better way to embrace our human rights than to feed a lion as though we are its master! If you need to hit the beach because it's hot, you surely need to feed the 'king of the jungle' right?!You are the real king. Go show them who's boss!
(Bonus points for rubbing the meat all over yourself before entering the cage)
2). See how far your car can get out to sea by driving off a cliff
Yes, of course in this case, your human right to be a winner may be helped by the mechanical wonder of the modern day motor vehicle. However, it is your driving skills that will help get the greatest distance! Also, you're probably already at the beach so it's easy to organise this show of human strength!Come on, we know you can do it. Grab your beach buddies and go for it!
(Bonus points for using a bicycle)
3). Medium-Rare Chicken Breast
Can there be any greater show of human strength than to gnaw down on an under-cooked piece of chicken? Of course not!Imagine all those idiots that follow good food hygiene and can survive to live another day without fear of repercussions.
(Bonus points if the chicken is still moving when you eat it)
So there we have it, the three best alternatives to crowding on a beach during lockdown. We can't wait to be impressed by the strongest beach bods out there!
Come on people, don't let us down!
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