British Pie Week - Ingredients to Avoid

Another week begins, and we find ourselves engrossed in another 'week'.

This week, it's British Pie Week, the crustiest (real word) of all the weeks!

Whether you like to stick to the traditional pies, such as steak and kidney, or if you prefer the newfangled trendy options such as an artichoke and spinach pie, we can all agree that the humble pie is the backbone of British cuisine.

A dish for all occasions, it is not only savoury options that delight us, but also sweet treats such as the classic apple pie.

We could honestly talk for hours about all the delicious pie options out there, but today we are looking at options that should never be considered for pies.

We present to you the top five things to NEVER put in a pie.

1). Celery, Just Celery

We are fully aware that celery has been used in many pie recipes in the past, for example, leek and celery pie, however celery on its own is a big no-no.

Celery - God's work? Or the devil?

It is widely accepted that evolution created celery as a joke item. With a taste like the used side of a loofah, it is only good as a supplementary ingredient. As per the aforementioned pie, it is leek AND celery. There is even a pork, apple AND celery pie. Perfectly acceptable.

If you have a celery pie, and the title doesn't include the word 'and', then I'm afraid you simply do not deserve a pie!

2). Another Pie

Yes, we get it, you're edgy. A pie in a pie? How very 'Michelin Star' of you!

Rumours of the double pie have been in circulation around the internet for a few years now, but quite frankly it must stop.

Don't do it. Respect the pie, its structure, and the years of heritage that has made it what it is today.

3). Blackbirds

Disclaimer - Not a real bird

Now, we are definitely one for tradition, and how can you get more traditional than blackbirds baked in a pie? You can't, especially if there are four and twenty blackbirds baked in a pie.

However, as the below nursery rhyme highlights, there are multiple issues with doing such a thing.

Issue 1: Blackbirds are not commercially available as meat, and therefore you could end up eating diseased meat.

Issue 2: The birds, even after being baked, were able to sing, suggesting they are still alive. This would make for very uncomfortable eating.

Issue 3: The pie is still 'dainty'. Pies should not be dainty.

I think it is fair to say that blackbirds in a pie is a no-go area.

4). Anything hairy

We have all had that long-suffering feeling of getting a hair stuck in our throat. That itchy-tickle feeling that grates on you for hours. Then, just when you think you have managed to remove the hair, either by swallowing it or picking it out, boom...there it is again!

To lower the chances of this happening to you during your pie experience, you should avoid the following:

• Raspberries (strawberries are a good replacement)
• Kiwi Fruit
• Having long hair when making a pie (you can always grow it back after)
• Pork Scratchings

This is not an exhaustive list, but it's a start!

5). Custard

This is the last entry on our list, and maybe the most controversial, but custard should never be used in a pie.

A truly monumental substance, and loved the world over, custard is baked as part of many pies, but are these really pies?

No lid - Is this a pie?

As can be seen in the above image, custard is the main constituent of this pie. It is tasty no doubt, but without the lid, is it really a pie?

We implore you, if you must have custard then add it to the top of a lidded pie. It's the only way to go!

lid = pie / custard = yummy

So there we have it folks. Our top five things to never put in a pie.

Do you have any further suggestions of ingredients that should never find their way into your crusty treat? Let us know in the comments box below.

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